Keep Clacton Tidy T-Shirt

Keep Clacton Tidy.

Clacton-on-Sea is a seaside town in Essex with real problems: seasonal work, a struggling high street, and a hospital that is not around the corner. What it got instead was a member of parliament who treats the constituency as a backdrop, a place to be photographed in, then left for a studio, a podcast or a fundraising dinner somewhere else. Attendance in the chamber and appearances in the town are both matters of public record, and residents have noticed the gap. A litter bin, by contrast, is on site every day of the year.

Tidying up means putting things where they belong. Clacton belongs to the people who live there all year. Some of what has been dropped in it did not come from Clacton at all.

Keep Clacton Tidy.

This is the shirt for anyone who thinks a constituency should be a place, not a launchpad. Give it to the relative in Essex who has stopped answering the door to canvassers and started answering the door with a bin bag.

Three words across the chest, set plain and centred, in the flat civic tone of a council sign screwed to a lamppost.

Size guide

Size	Length (cm)	Width (cm)	Length (in)	Width (in)
S	71	46	28	18
M	74	51	29	20
L	76	56	30	22
XL	79	61	31	24
2XL	81	66	32	26

Measurements are of the garment laid flat, not of the body. Length runs from the highest point of the shoulder to the hem, and width straight across the chest one inch below the armhole. Regular unisex fit, true to size. If you are between sizes, or you want it looser, size up.

See the full sizing chart

Delivery and returns

Free to the UK and the EU, with no minimum spend. £3.95 to the rest of Europe, North America, Australia and New Zealand, and £8.95 to the rest of the world. We ship to more than 40 countries.

Everything is made to order, so most orders arrive within 3 to 7 business days. You get a tracking link the moment it ships.

You have 30 days from the day it arrives to send it back, unworn and in its packaging. Email hello@verybrexitproblems.com and we will send you the instructions. If you have simply changed your mind the return postage is yours. If it arrives damaged or it is not what you ordered, send us a photo and we will replace it or refund it at our cost, postage included.

Care and materials

Machine wash cold and inside out, then tumble dry low or hang it up. Do that and the design will outlast the government that inspired it.

100% combed and ring-spun cotton, pre-shrunk and side-seamed, with shoulder-to-shoulder taping so it holds its shape. The fabric is OEKO-TEX certified, which means it is tested free from harmful substances and safe against your skin. Every shirt is made to order in small numbers rather than mass produced and left in a warehouse.

About Very Brexit Problems

VBP started in 2016, on the day the country voted to make itself poorer and called it sovereignty. What began as a way of coping turned into a community of hundreds of thousands of people who never stopped believing Britain belongs in Europe.

Every design starts the same way. Something absurd happens, somebody has to say so, and a shirt says it for a good deal longer than a tweet does. Mocking the con since 2016.